i have gotten used to having internet just about everywhere i go. having a constant connection to the world is something technology people really come to rely on. i can send email, im or have ip based phone calls anytime and anywhere. well, that’s almost anytime. the exclusion appears to be indonesia during a rain storm.
i went to a café the other day and had to ask the it guy for help getting connected. there seemed to be an issue with the WiFi connection they were providing. the first and most quickly corrected issue was that they were charging for internet, something i had not expected. i asked why, given the location i would have assumed they would provide it free.
he explained to me that he was paying rupiah 14,000,000 per month for 364 bits per second. this is about the same price we pay for 6 mega bits (18 times more) of connection for the office, with the amount of bandwidth i have with the GPRS/3G connection of my hand phone. meaning the café is sharing a connection for all its patrons, at the price of a high speed leased line in malaysia, and getting the underpowered service of typical hand phone connection. he explained this as the reason for needing to charge; i had to agree i would have charged as well.
my hand phone has been mostly useless this trip. i have sms, and have made phone calls with one of the worst connections i have heard in asia. this is much worse than the service i got in india and vietnam. this is my new grading system for asian countries, how well they provide cheap, stable and affordable internet/phone connections. indonesia is way behind on the curve. malaysia is well ahead, malaysia has spoiled me by having such stable and wide connectivity. of course i am on a island, during a sever rain storm, not in a capital city. i guess i need a trip to jakarta for a fair comparison.
the storm has taken down the connection at the resort also. i am almost completely packed. i planned on spending a bit of time easing back into work by catching up on email, but there is no way. i have returned my moto and don’t want to walk to a café to do the email. i have decided to sit in the open air reception area, typing and enjoying the feel of wind on the side of my face. the blinking christmas tree a nice contrast to the hindu statues which dominate the entrances to the classic polynesian space.
it’s almost a relief that the vacation will end without work. the relaxed nature of the past six days has been assisted by the ability to completely disconnect and get away from all things stressful. the moments of tension i have felt this week have been those times when i did reach out to the world, or allowed the world to come into my balinese vacation.
it has been good to take a few days and to trade my free internet world for one that is free of internet. the disconnection has been what i needed. i am hours away from an airplane ride that will take me back to my standard level of connection. i am looking forward to landing and cleaning up my inbox while i am waiting for my bag to come off the carousel. until then i have time to sit and enjoy the last few hours of separation from the world.
I am going to go down to the beach; I want to see the waves breaking onto the shore. Water pushed by wind and tide, collapsing under its own weight as it is confronted with the sand. Being internet free is like being that water, fluidly passing through the day with nothing to stop or alter its motion.
As I land in a few hours, the welcome connection to the world will also bring the mounting pressure of water behind me. The trick will be to find a way to act as the gently breaking waves which slide onto the beach, lapping at the sand softly.
Free internet is good, internet free is also.
Thursday, December 27, 2007
monsoon christmas
i went to sleep last night to the pleasant sound of steady rain outside my hotel room. i woke to the same, the melody of the drops hitting the tile floor are soft and soothing. it is the kind of sound you can lay and enjoy for hours, both for the pure comfort of the sound and because you know leaving the your darkened room will involve braving the storm.
today is christmas day. calls have been made to say merry christmas to friends and family. my hand phone has been beeping with sms all day as other friends close the gaps of space with short messages of noel. a few of these holiday wishes have come from people i thought had forgotten me entirely, those messages were mostly broadcast types, so maybe they have. others were personalized and personal. a chance for a friend to connect and wish another friend good wishes on a special day.
it has been raining in bali for most of the time i have been here. the past few days have been a complete wash out, heavy rains that have flooded the streets and kept most people hidden under atap. the sky will lighten and darken as the day goes on, but the steady rain never seems to end. the sounds of running or falling water is ever present. even inside with music or television on, the sound is there to remind you that the storm continues.
i went out last night for a traditional christmas eve dinner of fajitas and watered down slushy margaritas. this was in a club that overlooks the monument built at the sight of the christmas bombings a few years ago. as i ate i could see the list of names of the fallen. although the pseudo-mexican (hey it’s better than i can find in kl so i am not complaining) was just okay, the crepe at the end was very good and the coffee was a nice plus. as i asked for the bill, i noticed a few drops of rain on the street. after i had paid the bill i looked up with trepidation, those drops had turned into a sheet of falling rain with strong wind driving it into the glass wall to the outside.
the patrons on the balcony were brought inside and the sliding doors were closed. as i sat, my change in front of me, i tried to decide if this was a squall which would pass or a storm which would last too long for me to sit it out among the crowd. after a few minutes i decided to brave the storm without a rain coat, thoughts of bumping along on my moto dodging hidden holes in the indonesian roads. the real issue was that the rain was so heavy; i knew i would need to ride without my glasses, meaning dark, wet, flooded streets with less than perfect vision. what could go wrong?
as i drove past the wind swept beach, squinting my eyes against the heavy drops being blasted into my face, i remembered riding my bike home on a christmas night when i was a teen. i had been out with my friends and had… well lets say we had enjoyed the christmas cheer and were very relaxed by the end of the night. i was riding home, feeling snow on my face, slightly stinging as the cold touched my warm cheeks. as i glided into a corner, there was a car making a turn and i was going too fast, i hit the breaks hard and went into a slide which sent me quickly to the ground. on that dark and cold night i slid through the icy intersection tumbling between two moving cars. i could easily have ended up under the wheels of one of these cars, but was somehow protected from real harm and walked away with bumps and an understanding that i was just given a new chance.
this night years ago was with me as i drove in this new storm, half a world away from my former home, during a monsoon and with vision blurred by rain and lack of corrective lenses. the blurriness brought back the thought of this prior stupid event. here i was years later, older, smarter and still willing to believe that if i went out into the storm i could find my way with at worst a few bumps and bruises. this time i made it with no crash. i went to bed after a warming shower, snuggled in and slept to the sound of the drops outside my door. reminding me that the storm was going to last longer than the drive, and that i was right to not try to avoid going out in the rain. even if it was scary at points, it was worth it to be able to sleep safely in a warm bed.
this morning, christmas morning, came with rain still falling. it’s now christmas night, the storm has only gotten worse. i am again snuggled in, and listening to the drops. other than sms and calls to loved ones i have avoided the holiday completely. i have come to an island paradise and ridden out the storm. i have braved the rain, and realized that later the sun will come out. i am hoping the next time in paradise is warm and sunny, but i can accept that this time it ended in days of rain.
i have enjoyed my monsoon christmas, i will never forget the sound of the rain.
today is christmas day. calls have been made to say merry christmas to friends and family. my hand phone has been beeping with sms all day as other friends close the gaps of space with short messages of noel. a few of these holiday wishes have come from people i thought had forgotten me entirely, those messages were mostly broadcast types, so maybe they have. others were personalized and personal. a chance for a friend to connect and wish another friend good wishes on a special day.
it has been raining in bali for most of the time i have been here. the past few days have been a complete wash out, heavy rains that have flooded the streets and kept most people hidden under atap. the sky will lighten and darken as the day goes on, but the steady rain never seems to end. the sounds of running or falling water is ever present. even inside with music or television on, the sound is there to remind you that the storm continues.
i went out last night for a traditional christmas eve dinner of fajitas and watered down slushy margaritas. this was in a club that overlooks the monument built at the sight of the christmas bombings a few years ago. as i ate i could see the list of names of the fallen. although the pseudo-mexican (hey it’s better than i can find in kl so i am not complaining) was just okay, the crepe at the end was very good and the coffee was a nice plus. as i asked for the bill, i noticed a few drops of rain on the street. after i had paid the bill i looked up with trepidation, those drops had turned into a sheet of falling rain with strong wind driving it into the glass wall to the outside.
the patrons on the balcony were brought inside and the sliding doors were closed. as i sat, my change in front of me, i tried to decide if this was a squall which would pass or a storm which would last too long for me to sit it out among the crowd. after a few minutes i decided to brave the storm without a rain coat, thoughts of bumping along on my moto dodging hidden holes in the indonesian roads. the real issue was that the rain was so heavy; i knew i would need to ride without my glasses, meaning dark, wet, flooded streets with less than perfect vision. what could go wrong?
as i drove past the wind swept beach, squinting my eyes against the heavy drops being blasted into my face, i remembered riding my bike home on a christmas night when i was a teen. i had been out with my friends and had… well lets say we had enjoyed the christmas cheer and were very relaxed by the end of the night. i was riding home, feeling snow on my face, slightly stinging as the cold touched my warm cheeks. as i glided into a corner, there was a car making a turn and i was going too fast, i hit the breaks hard and went into a slide which sent me quickly to the ground. on that dark and cold night i slid through the icy intersection tumbling between two moving cars. i could easily have ended up under the wheels of one of these cars, but was somehow protected from real harm and walked away with bumps and an understanding that i was just given a new chance.
this night years ago was with me as i drove in this new storm, half a world away from my former home, during a monsoon and with vision blurred by rain and lack of corrective lenses. the blurriness brought back the thought of this prior stupid event. here i was years later, older, smarter and still willing to believe that if i went out into the storm i could find my way with at worst a few bumps and bruises. this time i made it with no crash. i went to bed after a warming shower, snuggled in and slept to the sound of the drops outside my door. reminding me that the storm was going to last longer than the drive, and that i was right to not try to avoid going out in the rain. even if it was scary at points, it was worth it to be able to sleep safely in a warm bed.
this morning, christmas morning, came with rain still falling. it’s now christmas night, the storm has only gotten worse. i am again snuggled in, and listening to the drops. other than sms and calls to loved ones i have avoided the holiday completely. i have come to an island paradise and ridden out the storm. i have braved the rain, and realized that later the sun will come out. i am hoping the next time in paradise is warm and sunny, but i can accept that this time it ended in days of rain.
i have enjoyed my monsoon christmas, i will never forget the sound of the rain.
Monday, December 24, 2007
christmas wishes
it is that time of year. there is no avoiding it, christmas is here. i really have done my best to avoid it. i have one no christmas shopping, not one thing. this is the first time since i was, 12 i guess, that i have not gone out and done christmas shopping. instead, i have run away to a polynesian island full of hindus and muslims, which has horrible internet connection to the outside world, hoping to not be reminded of the holiday. christmas is in two days, and i feel no stress or pressure at all.
i do have some christmas presents i want to give, but since i have done no shopping it will have to be things which i can not purchase. i will not use names, but when i give you your present, sorry i didn’t wrap the gift. [i can wrap now, i had to learn a few years ago, one more skill from growing up and finding independence].
to all my friends at work, i hope you can all make a trip to polynesia soon, if not i hope you find your own way to relax and reflect on the important things in life. work is not life, lets all give ourselves the ability to have balance in the coming year.
i have a friend who is horrible with communication. to this person i would like to give the ability to communicate openly, with themselves and those around them. keeping things hidden, not admitting the reality of the situation and hoping that others don’t find out is not a way to live. it impacts others, hoping that it doesn’t is not enough. to this friend i give the ability to communicate, first of all to them self.
i have a friend who has just made a hard decision, and is not sure if they can go thru with the plan the decision is based on. fear of the future and the regret for the past are the issues blocking you. i give you strength to see the plan thru. if this is what you need than make sure that you get it.
to my friend who is hiding in the hospital and not telling others they are there, first i say congratulations on pulling off a plan that has all the markings of a well run CIA operation. i give health and stability. you deserve both and i hope this year you have it.
to my friend who is always immersed in work, and who is not sure if others can be trusted enough to take the time to give them a chance, i give courage and luck. the courage is to allow you to let someone in, and the luck is to find someone who is worth taking the chance.
to my friend who has been struggling to make a decision, you know what you need to do. i give you the clarity to finally see that you can trust your instincts and move forward. you deserve to be happy; i hope the clarity allows you to see that also.
finally, to my friend who believes they need to stay a course because of how their decisions will be seen by others. i give you the ability to understand that you need to come first, and that others will understand that you need to do things to be happy. if they love you, they will support you, if they don’t support you, well to you i will give a second gift the ability to tell them it’s just too f-ing bad.
to each of my children, i give you the love that fills my heart every single day. you are each perfect in yourself, and i love you all for who you are. you also each light my life. i give you the ability to see how much you mean to me, and feel the warmth of that light from the other side of the planet.
to the rest of my family, i give you all health and happiness. i am sorry i am not there to wish you merry christmas in person. i hope you know i never wanted anytime more than to spend one more christmas with you, always.
merry christmas to all of you, for those of you who do not celebrate christmas, enjoy your presents anyway, they are from the heart.
i do have some christmas presents i want to give, but since i have done no shopping it will have to be things which i can not purchase. i will not use names, but when i give you your present, sorry i didn’t wrap the gift. [i can wrap now, i had to learn a few years ago, one more skill from growing up and finding independence].
to all my friends at work, i hope you can all make a trip to polynesia soon, if not i hope you find your own way to relax and reflect on the important things in life. work is not life, lets all give ourselves the ability to have balance in the coming year.
i have a friend who is horrible with communication. to this person i would like to give the ability to communicate openly, with themselves and those around them. keeping things hidden, not admitting the reality of the situation and hoping that others don’t find out is not a way to live. it impacts others, hoping that it doesn’t is not enough. to this friend i give the ability to communicate, first of all to them self.
i have a friend who has just made a hard decision, and is not sure if they can go thru with the plan the decision is based on. fear of the future and the regret for the past are the issues blocking you. i give you strength to see the plan thru. if this is what you need than make sure that you get it.
to my friend who is hiding in the hospital and not telling others they are there, first i say congratulations on pulling off a plan that has all the markings of a well run CIA operation. i give health and stability. you deserve both and i hope this year you have it.
to my friend who is always immersed in work, and who is not sure if others can be trusted enough to take the time to give them a chance, i give courage and luck. the courage is to allow you to let someone in, and the luck is to find someone who is worth taking the chance.
to my friend who has been struggling to make a decision, you know what you need to do. i give you the clarity to finally see that you can trust your instincts and move forward. you deserve to be happy; i hope the clarity allows you to see that also.
finally, to my friend who believes they need to stay a course because of how their decisions will be seen by others. i give you the ability to understand that you need to come first, and that others will understand that you need to do things to be happy. if they love you, they will support you, if they don’t support you, well to you i will give a second gift the ability to tell them it’s just too f-ing bad.
to each of my children, i give you the love that fills my heart every single day. you are each perfect in yourself, and i love you all for who you are. you also each light my life. i give you the ability to see how much you mean to me, and feel the warmth of that light from the other side of the planet.
to the rest of my family, i give you all health and happiness. i am sorry i am not there to wish you merry christmas in person. i hope you know i never wanted anytime more than to spend one more christmas with you, always.
merry christmas to all of you, for those of you who do not celebrate christmas, enjoy your presents anyway, they are from the heart.
Sunday, December 23, 2007
i charlotte
i have had a realization. i have been thinking about the characters on shows i like and who i most deeply identify with. this is game i have played in the past, as you watch or as you are talking to others about a show, a character or a scene you can start to shadows of the virtual acquaintances (dare i say friends) within yourself or the person you are talking to.
i have shows i enjoy. with my schedule and my tendency to nest when i have down time, i like to frequent my local dvd shop and purchase series, which i can then watch straight thru. the most recent purchases have been “my name is earl”, “dexter”, “black donnellys” and “entourage” (season 4). they are shows about a loser recovering his life by recognizing karma, a serial-killer who kills with a conscience, a group of irish-american gangsters (who are surprisingly like my friends when i was growing up) and a movie star and his friends living “in the business” of hollywood.
in each of these shows, and others, there are characters or situations i can identify with. earl, who lives his life with a new code of ethics built on a comment made by late night talk show host, is an example. as long as he does good things, good things happen. more or less the same situation as my belief that if i am stay calm and relaxed i will have good things happen; but that frustration will bring me bad instead. i can also see myself in ari, the super-agent who focuses on work, many times at the expense of the rest of his life.
one show that stands out though is “sex in the city”. sitc is one of those shows that will come back to you over and over as you live. the structure of the show is built to show you the sides of yourself which we all have within us. the men and women of the show are presented to highlight the different thoughts or reactions we each have; the round-table discussions and carrie’s reflective writing is a vehicle to allow the show’s writers to explore the differences between the characters. the show is kept non-judgmental to allow the audience to see lifestyles are open to differences of opinion as to what is “proper”. the differences show us that we can be multi-faceted ourselves without guilt or confusion.
i have always seen myself in that show as a mix of the male characters. at work and at times in my personal life i am big. the fact that he loves carrie, but is still able to lead a life away from her without remorse resonates. he also seems to be there when carrie needs him most, whether it’s a ride or a shoulder to cry on, big finds a way to be there. but i am also a bit like aden, the creative and sensitive furniture maker who proposed from his knee and only wanted to make carrie happy.
the realization is that i can look to the women also and find parts of myself. i may just as likely to be one of the women in the show. as a lesbian in a man’s body, i can identify with the women. samantha is the most male of the women but she is too over the top for me, she does not need a relationship, she just wants a night. carrie is able to see others well and writes, but is too indecisive, she says she wants it all, but she seems to stay alone and looking to the end (did she and big really work, i doubt it but lets see when the movie comes out). miranda is the one i normally identify with, smart and driven, capable and never needing someone to complete her. she is a person who knows herself, but she is also too hard on others to let them in (poor steve, falling in love with a lesbian).
leaving us with charlotte, who in the show is the most shy of the women. she spells s.e.x, rather than saying it out loud. she is shocked by many of the exploits of her friends, but she is never judgmental. she is also the one that most badly wants a family. she tries so hard, and can not seem to find the way to make this happen. i am not like charlotte early in the show; i am more like the person she is transforming into as the show comes to an end. she has become more jaded and practical, but she never becomes the harsher side which her friends represent. she ends up with her lawyer, who she doesn’t really like at first, just taking him for s.e.x. and falls in love with him. she also accepts him, even when he takes her at his word and “gets comfortable” in there home. okay, i look and act a lot like the lawyer. i am also known for “getting comfortable”, but i think i am more like charlotte herself.
she needs the relationship to be happy, she never loses her sense of hope and belief in good things, and in the end she finds happiness in a place she did not think she would ever find it. i think i share these things with the little debutant. now, all i need is a flaming little pr/stylist who will take me shopping for a wedding dress and always tell me its time to move on and not look back. someone to scream at those around me and protect me from myself when i lose confidence or when i am not willing to take a risk.
charlotte just wanted to find someone nice, someone to make a life with, to have it all and to enjoy the world as she did it. this is what i identify most with, no matter what happened in her life she knew she did need someone, that their feelings mattered and that at some point she needed to make a decision and trust the future. the goodness in charlotte is the part of i love the most.
i hope i am charlotte, my other choice is dr. gregory “house”. i would rather be hopeful and happy than scarcastic and self medicating. I would rather see the world as happy and exciting, than to view the world as a puzzle built on lies. we all have many sides, but we need to remember what sides we are going to foster and develop.
i pick charlotte.
i have shows i enjoy. with my schedule and my tendency to nest when i have down time, i like to frequent my local dvd shop and purchase series, which i can then watch straight thru. the most recent purchases have been “my name is earl”, “dexter”, “black donnellys” and “entourage” (season 4). they are shows about a loser recovering his life by recognizing karma, a serial-killer who kills with a conscience, a group of irish-american gangsters (who are surprisingly like my friends when i was growing up) and a movie star and his friends living “in the business” of hollywood.
in each of these shows, and others, there are characters or situations i can identify with. earl, who lives his life with a new code of ethics built on a comment made by late night talk show host, is an example. as long as he does good things, good things happen. more or less the same situation as my belief that if i am stay calm and relaxed i will have good things happen; but that frustration will bring me bad instead. i can also see myself in ari, the super-agent who focuses on work, many times at the expense of the rest of his life.
one show that stands out though is “sex in the city”. sitc is one of those shows that will come back to you over and over as you live. the structure of the show is built to show you the sides of yourself which we all have within us. the men and women of the show are presented to highlight the different thoughts or reactions we each have; the round-table discussions and carrie’s reflective writing is a vehicle to allow the show’s writers to explore the differences between the characters. the show is kept non-judgmental to allow the audience to see lifestyles are open to differences of opinion as to what is “proper”. the differences show us that we can be multi-faceted ourselves without guilt or confusion.
i have always seen myself in that show as a mix of the male characters. at work and at times in my personal life i am big. the fact that he loves carrie, but is still able to lead a life away from her without remorse resonates. he also seems to be there when carrie needs him most, whether it’s a ride or a shoulder to cry on, big finds a way to be there. but i am also a bit like aden, the creative and sensitive furniture maker who proposed from his knee and only wanted to make carrie happy.
the realization is that i can look to the women also and find parts of myself. i may just as likely to be one of the women in the show. as a lesbian in a man’s body, i can identify with the women. samantha is the most male of the women but she is too over the top for me, she does not need a relationship, she just wants a night. carrie is able to see others well and writes, but is too indecisive, she says she wants it all, but she seems to stay alone and looking to the end (did she and big really work, i doubt it but lets see when the movie comes out). miranda is the one i normally identify with, smart and driven, capable and never needing someone to complete her. she is a person who knows herself, but she is also too hard on others to let them in (poor steve, falling in love with a lesbian).
leaving us with charlotte, who in the show is the most shy of the women. she spells s.e.x, rather than saying it out loud. she is shocked by many of the exploits of her friends, but she is never judgmental. she is also the one that most badly wants a family. she tries so hard, and can not seem to find the way to make this happen. i am not like charlotte early in the show; i am more like the person she is transforming into as the show comes to an end. she has become more jaded and practical, but she never becomes the harsher side which her friends represent. she ends up with her lawyer, who she doesn’t really like at first, just taking him for s.e.x. and falls in love with him. she also accepts him, even when he takes her at his word and “gets comfortable” in there home. okay, i look and act a lot like the lawyer. i am also known for “getting comfortable”, but i think i am more like charlotte herself.
she needs the relationship to be happy, she never loses her sense of hope and belief in good things, and in the end she finds happiness in a place she did not think she would ever find it. i think i share these things with the little debutant. now, all i need is a flaming little pr/stylist who will take me shopping for a wedding dress and always tell me its time to move on and not look back. someone to scream at those around me and protect me from myself when i lose confidence or when i am not willing to take a risk.
charlotte just wanted to find someone nice, someone to make a life with, to have it all and to enjoy the world as she did it. this is what i identify most with, no matter what happened in her life she knew she did need someone, that their feelings mattered and that at some point she needed to make a decision and trust the future. the goodness in charlotte is the part of i love the most.
i hope i am charlotte, my other choice is dr. gregory “house”. i would rather be hopeful and happy than scarcastic and self medicating. I would rather see the world as happy and exciting, than to view the world as a puzzle built on lies. we all have many sides, but we need to remember what sides we are going to foster and develop.
i pick charlotte.
relaxed bali
i decided last week, after weeks of indecision, to get away from KL for the holidays and go to a beach resort known for christmas bombings targeting bule (indonesian for matsalleh). december is just not turning out the way i would have planned. but, bali seems to be the trick to counter the past few weeks of unending work stress and of a looming holiday i wish to simply avoid. i feel better after a day here than i have in KL in two years. my image of indonesia was completely wrong, i am not sure if it’s the whole country, but this island is a gem that i hope to see a lot of.
landing in denpasar was an experience; water on both sides of the runway and landing over surfers riding waves was something you just don't see in KLIA. immigration was also and experience… well lets say its what i have expected to see in other parts of asia, and have been surprised when it was not. an hour long wait in a line of travel weary, and somewhat smelly, europeans. somehow the moods stayed upbeat, even while the single threaded queue stalled waiting for the pleasant drones to process and stamp the USD 10 “visa on arrival” that every passenger seemed to need. the process took three booths, one to pay, one to give visa, one to stamp visa. my ipod with “bowling for soup” and “r. l. burnside” got me though it.
the roads in bali are a mix of vietnam and india. motos create their own lanes on the littered highway; weaving between cars slowly passing rice paddies, with workers trying to squeeze out a crop. the interesting thing is that the roads also feel like the us. the shops on the side, the signs, the brands, the simple vibe of the people feels more like a summer resort in the us than anything i have ever felt in asia. renting a moto was the best choice i have made here. for the price of a round trip taxi from my hotel to kuta (34,000 rupiah or USD 3.60) i have complete freedom to get lost on my own.
my first full day here was spent mostly relaxing. i am on my 6th or so day of no hunger. i woke up this morning and stayed in bed, i had no need for food and no desire to get up to do much of anything. i was more than content to just stay there and ignore the rainy day outside. when i did finally get moving, i rented the moto and found that my sense of direction held together to get me back to the café i was in yesterday. coffee, baguette and a bit of lamb, and i was on my way back to the hotel for a massage. i had talked to two of the masseuse last night, one was working in the morning, the other at night. the first promised a harder massage, the second was less strong but said i might like her traditional massage also.
the first 90 minute massage was so nice, that i scheduled the second massage as 2 hours. i never have massage this much, or for so long. the second massage was not something i would have missed. the traditional massage was nice, very gentle and slow. while the moments were slowly slipping by, pushed forward by the sublime oiled hands on my skin, it began to rain. the light drops of the day were replaced by a down pour with lightening and crashing waves heard from the beach. the dark massage room, over looking the beach side pool, was a secluded location to watch drops splash into the water with explosive plops. the sounds were a mix of the storm, waves and music from pool side bar playing reggae and light rock for a few patrons staying out of the warm rain.
the massage ended with a ginger tea and a look at the calendar for the rest of my stay. i will not go every day, but at 300,000 rupiah (USD 32) for a two hour massage how can i not consider another visit. the fact that the masseuse is a beautiful woman who happens to have hands of sensuality is a bonus that i will not pass up.
bali is a place to relax. the surf shops, bungee jumping, white water rafting, shopping, scuba diving and all the other pleasures of a beach resort will simply need to wait. tomorrow looks to be another slow day. i bought a road map on one of my moto trips today, now i can find anything and go anywhere. i just need to decide what it is that i want to do. simply being in this wonderful town, meeting people, enjoying kari ayam or babi guling if i want to, having a drink and listening to the waves may be the only plans that i have for tomorrow.
no stress, i am relaxing in bali.
landing in denpasar was an experience; water on both sides of the runway and landing over surfers riding waves was something you just don't see in KLIA. immigration was also and experience… well lets say its what i have expected to see in other parts of asia, and have been surprised when it was not. an hour long wait in a line of travel weary, and somewhat smelly, europeans. somehow the moods stayed upbeat, even while the single threaded queue stalled waiting for the pleasant drones to process and stamp the USD 10 “visa on arrival” that every passenger seemed to need. the process took three booths, one to pay, one to give visa, one to stamp visa. my ipod with “bowling for soup” and “r. l. burnside” got me though it.
the roads in bali are a mix of vietnam and india. motos create their own lanes on the littered highway; weaving between cars slowly passing rice paddies, with workers trying to squeeze out a crop. the interesting thing is that the roads also feel like the us. the shops on the side, the signs, the brands, the simple vibe of the people feels more like a summer resort in the us than anything i have ever felt in asia. renting a moto was the best choice i have made here. for the price of a round trip taxi from my hotel to kuta (34,000 rupiah or USD 3.60) i have complete freedom to get lost on my own.
my first full day here was spent mostly relaxing. i am on my 6th or so day of no hunger. i woke up this morning and stayed in bed, i had no need for food and no desire to get up to do much of anything. i was more than content to just stay there and ignore the rainy day outside. when i did finally get moving, i rented the moto and found that my sense of direction held together to get me back to the café i was in yesterday. coffee, baguette and a bit of lamb, and i was on my way back to the hotel for a massage. i had talked to two of the masseuse last night, one was working in the morning, the other at night. the first promised a harder massage, the second was less strong but said i might like her traditional massage also.
the first 90 minute massage was so nice, that i scheduled the second massage as 2 hours. i never have massage this much, or for so long. the second massage was not something i would have missed. the traditional massage was nice, very gentle and slow. while the moments were slowly slipping by, pushed forward by the sublime oiled hands on my skin, it began to rain. the light drops of the day were replaced by a down pour with lightening and crashing waves heard from the beach. the dark massage room, over looking the beach side pool, was a secluded location to watch drops splash into the water with explosive plops. the sounds were a mix of the storm, waves and music from pool side bar playing reggae and light rock for a few patrons staying out of the warm rain.
the massage ended with a ginger tea and a look at the calendar for the rest of my stay. i will not go every day, but at 300,000 rupiah (USD 32) for a two hour massage how can i not consider another visit. the fact that the masseuse is a beautiful woman who happens to have hands of sensuality is a bonus that i will not pass up.
bali is a place to relax. the surf shops, bungee jumping, white water rafting, shopping, scuba diving and all the other pleasures of a beach resort will simply need to wait. tomorrow looks to be another slow day. i bought a road map on one of my moto trips today, now i can find anything and go anywhere. i just need to decide what it is that i want to do. simply being in this wonderful town, meeting people, enjoying kari ayam or babi guling if i want to, having a drink and listening to the waves may be the only plans that i have for tomorrow.
no stress, i am relaxing in bali.
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
customer service rethought
my last post was about a bit negative. okay, so you sit in KLIA for hours and listen to the bell sounds with your number never seeming to get closer and see how you feel. tell me in the same situation you would not do the same. but, as time has passed i have realized there is also some very good customer service in the country. you just need to look closer and appreciate the things
the first thing i noticed was the level of service you can get at a mamak stand. we all have our favorite mamak place and i am no different. the guys at who work there know me, they remember what i like and they bring it to me almost without asking. but even if i were not a regular customer, i fully believe the staff would still go above and beyond for me and do the things that are really needed in mamak.
the last two times i have had mamak, the staff has stepped in and helped me in ways i would not expect for a cheap restaurant where tipping is not required. the first time a waiter i did not know swept by the table, knocked a thumb sized cockroach off the table and stomped on it almost without breaking stride. the next time a staff member saw the rat scampering between tables and chased it away before most of the other clients had noticed. i am just lucky that i see so much of what goes on that i can appreciate the extra service.
the next great round of customer service i had was at “the curve”. i had been shopping for paint ball clothes, stop laughing really, and i had somehow lost my parking ticket. when i realized this at the auto pay, i read the sign that warned lost tickets would require a payment of RM 50 (come on USD 17, no way). so i drove up to the booth and waved the loitering staff member over and told him my predicament. after a few moments of discussion, i was paying the bloke inside the booth a RM 10 note and he was sending me on the way. this is a fee five times the weekend cost of parking. i find this to be a pretty reasonable premium to pay for the mistake of losing the ticket. and to find a staff who was able to help me adjust this was a major plus for me. i plan to do all my parking at the curve, but i will try harder to not lose my ticket.
the last customer service i have recently enjoyed was last sunday morning. i was on my way to a well earned pancake and coffee. i was sending an SMS as i drove and did not see the signs of my favorite speed trap quickly approaching. i was told i was going 92 km/j in an 80 km/j zone. this was a RM 300 fine which i could pay once the ticket was written. the kind police man, in his nice blue and white suit was very interested in my nationality, my length of time in the country and my job. these are not normally questions i answer in the west, but he seemed like i nice guy so i went with it. the next thing i knew, we had a new approach to the situation. the nice police man allowed me to expedite the payment of the fine, no ticket to lose of forget and only a third of the price he originally told me. i was off and enjoying my pancake faster than i could say “terima kasih”.
so as these three events show, there is wonderful customer service here in
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
customer service
i am sitting in the world’s best airport (voted two years in a row, 2005 and 2006 for airports with 15 – 25 million passengers a year). i am trapped here on a friday night because the airline i choose for a semi-planned christmas get away was unable to process my credit card without me showing up and waiting in a 5 hour queue. don’t think i didn’t try, i used the website, i called customer service, still i am sitting and listening to the most annoying bell sound with each ticket that is called. i feel like pavlov’s dog, each bell makes my head hurt.
i have a chair in the corner, i have a table, i have read four lessons in my “learn malay” book, and i realized “berapa lama” is meet with nothing more than a blank stare and that language books need really useful phrases like, “your customer service bites my royal irish ass hard”. i am sitting here and imagining my father in this situation. the man took weeks to get ready to go to the department of motor vehicles to ensure he was ready for the stress and pressure of the wait. i think he would kill someone here.
i was trying to place an ad in the major newspaper in the country last week. the ad was to support the hiring of staff into our company. i have questions from the media group in the us, ones that i needed answers on. the sales people in the paper simply ignored my questions, and never got back to me. this means they are losing a sale of tens of thousands of dollars, not ringgits, when i say dollars it’s the real thing, green backs baby, USD. the countries major newspaper can not take the time to tell a multinational company the best file format to send graphics to it, so the money never comes into the country.
i am sitting in front of 12 customer service counters. six of the counters are un-staffed and the other six appear to be homes to employees who are given valium before each shift. slow and steady movements are the course of action. the 80 or so other customers waiting around me seem to simply accept this as the way it is and always will be. this might be the worlds best airport, but this airline has some horrible customer service. the last time i bought a ticket and had to come to “collect” the paper ticket i asked when they would have e-tickets. i was by the service associate she hoped they would never have them, she was worried she might lose her job. at that moment, i really wished i did not need to make this 2 hour trip.
i have a new theory. malaysians who emigrate and then never come back actually want to, they simply can’t come to KLIA from
the upside to this is that i have had plenty of time to sit, study bahasa malayu saya, read, write, talk to friends on the phone and talk to the people around me. i just met a nice student who will one day build bridges and her mother who has promised to give me the number of her friend that can help me avoid spending my friday nights in a deli ticket airline queue from hell.
i guess this shows the real way locals deal with the horrible service they get in the country. they lepak with friends, they discuss and share the networking steps to avoid the issues and they survive by avoiding.
stress and release
here i am at 4 AM, writing for my blog while i watch a build [releasing software to the web], that i have been working on since 8 AM this morning, struggle to come to completion. today was a day of stress, a series of emails, phone calls, IM conversations and SMS exchanges which pushed the limits of stress; even for me. over the years i have gotten good at continuing to function under pressure that pushes others over their limit, its part of the job description. but i have noticed that i can only do this based on coping strategies and certain of my strategies have come into clarity for me recently.
first, when under stress i get very short with my communication skills. i am direct and to the point. when rushed i respond by going quickly. this is can be taken as arrogance or bullying, this is really not the way i want to be perceived. i feel bad about it when it happens. well no, when it happens i am fine because i am trying to get something done, its later that i am upset i could have upset others.
second, i react to stress with food cravings. the stress diet is not one of fruits and veggies, but sugar and caffeine. when under pressure i feel an urge, one that is hard to resist. i explained it today like a soft whisper that simply repeats in my head, over and over, “pop-tarts, pop-tarts, pop-tarts”. normally i am weak; sooner or later i cave in and reach for my little sugary friends and then for another. today i didn’t, i held firm and never took the sugar or caffeine fix that i deeply wanted.
next, i make random connections in my head and then ask others if they make any sense to them. i argued today that public safety announcements for seatbelts and helmets were counter to the public good. convincing people who cant figure out that safety devices are the smart thing for them and for their families is just stopping darwinism from succeeding via the inherent intelligence test. i am actually all for safety devices, but at the time, it seemed like an interesting argument and i needed the distraction, so i went with it. when i am under stress, when the pressure is mounting, expect me to just say random things and don’t convince yourself that i mean what i am asking. just that it was a thought that bounced into my head, and rather than think about the problem at hand, i thought it was interesting to think about this idea for a moment.
the last coping technique is that i tend to sing, dance, tap my fingers, and raise my voice just for the pure and utter fun of it. the asian kids in the office have gotten used to this i think. i am pretty sure they use this to read my mood. some people get gloomy, i tend to get jittery… hmmm, maybe that is related to the sugar and caffeine i had already ingested, and the fact that my mind is spinning with work and random thoughts which i am riffing at fast pace, but then again maybe its just another sign of pressure for me.
other than my response to the stress itself, i have noticed that post stress euphoria hits me pretty hard. when the pressure lifts because we have finally succeeded, i tend to go from intensely direct to wildly indirect and funny. i go into my full “stand up” mode where any need to limit the riffing associated with the random thoughts bouncing in my head is lost. i had a group of people laughing at this behavior today. they might be used to me in stressed mode, but in post stress i am just more than they expect from a boss.
i had my own boss a few years ago, who would start the week by saying, this is the week that you’re going to snap. i continued to say, “not now, not ever”. in the end i think he decided to send me half way around the world to see if that would do it. it hasn’t and in some ways it has made stress easier to deal with. i am sitting up watching colleagues finish things that have consumed the last 20 hours of my life, but they expect me to be asleep. its only when they realize that i am half way around the world and still up at 4 AM that someone might ask me to go to sleep and start working again in a few hours.
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